Holidays = Instant Anxiety for me. Not quite sure why. Just the way it’s always been. What to wear, where to go, what to bring. Moving fast. Not stopping to breathe in between. Then suddenly a screeching halt. In a sense Holidays stopped for me. I live them through the lives of others eyes. I listen from my bedroom window.. Car doors, Door bells, laughter, drunken shouts. I remain chained in my safe house. I move at a slow pace. In most people’s eyes so much time wasted. They couldn’t handle a taste test of this. Lonely Holiday-Less silent magic. I wait for life to make a move. To choose my current mood. Quiet and that’s okay for most of these made up anyway Holidays.