confessions of a hush girl

by HUSH GIRLNovember 4, 2019

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FREEDOM

2020January 1st, 2020

Time to leave.. and breathe.

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Self love is the chapter that I've always wanted to write. . . #me #happy #41 #readyforfun #selflove #reflection #hush #smile #faith #grace #gift #pic #moment #glimpse #grateful #persistence #rypolar #faithoverfear #brave #hushgirl #hushtan #resilient . . 📸 @teehee34 💄 @taelorfx 🎨 @hushtan_taelor

Turning.. #start #newchapter #turnpage #pageturner #go #movement #balance #breathe #regrouped #breathed #grieved #believe #thisismytime #watchme #grow #ready #grindwithgrace #marathon #energy #full 🔋 #letsconnect #2020 #iammahriah #hushgirl

Lord, please keep sadness away from my heart and worries from my mind. Bless me with a life of happiness, good health and good fortune. Happy Birthday to Me 🎈 . . #41 #gonnabefun #capricorn #2020 #herewego #grindwithgrace #fortunefavorsthebold #happytobeme #highbeam #chosen #favored #blessed #gratitude #beauty #hush #hushgirl #shhh #sweetdreams #yes #mmhmm #sleepingbeauty #dream 💭💰

To find peace. To process grief. You have to be willing to lose your connection with the people. places. & things that create all the noise. . . #connectedtoabundance #reflection #41 #capricorn #stronger #wiser #wip #blessed #fortunefavorsthebold #lifeisbeautiful #gratitide #reconnecting #dialup #energy 💭 #ofyou #thenandwhen #life #mahriah #2020 #hbdtome🎉

Grief .. Something I haven't experienced .. everyday .. 17 years .. Dedication .. Love I have been so..... empty. Not to ever discredit anyone's pain. But, for me Capone was my entire universe. We were interdependent. I never had an animal of any sort EVER before him. I was terrified of him when I was first gifted him (4 months) I wanted to send him back. Locked myself in the bathroom crying.. Had to call for backup. I had no clue how to take care of anything.. really.. let alone a dog. He kept getting me.. The vet said he had puppy piranha syndrome.. 😳WTF <--- I was stuck with this crazy dog🤦🏻‍♀️I had no clue he was just puppy and just wanted to play. I washed my hands ten thousand times.. I vacuumed twice a day. My house was ALL white/cream.. I NEVER could have believed I would fall in love with him... like this. Like.. more then my stuff. Nothing else mattered or compared anymore. The extra stuff just a bonus. God gifted me a best friend. I never had experienced unconditional love like his. Eyes always happy to see me. To calm me. I would have given anything for him. And truly I did. My life. My time. My relationships. I'd rather chill with him. He was my responsibility. I never boarded him ever. If he couldn't go I wouldn't. I turned down trips out of the country. Too far. Too long. I would never leave him. I could never make him feel.. abandoned. Like maybe.. I wasn't coming back. Being in the hospital 12 days after Lord.. It was hard to stay and heal. I wanted to be home. He got me through my hardest times. Was next to me.. Next to my grandpa in his final hours. Last year this time he went into heart failure. I had a conference I was so excited to go to. That moment - Life stopped for me. The vet told me 30 days or anytime.. He lived another year. I stayed home a lot. I was already.. a homebody. I really shut down. I didn't care about dinner or happy hour or anything really.. I couldn't imagine him passing and not being here. For a dinner? A night out? I had to push myself. I became more depressed. Reclusive. His caugh became worse. I watched him slow down. I watched him.. keep his dignity till the end. I worked from home a lot. Continued in comments

LOVE WITHOUT CONDITIONS 🐾 🐾 🐾 #lifeofcapone #loyalty #love #firstbaby #1 #puppylove #17 #life #momentsofmine #him #security #confidant #bestfriend #energy #minpin #missinghim #hush #puppy

I AM an old soul that believes in chivalry, romance, loyalty, respect, dedication, honor = L.O.V.E 🌹 #capone 🐾

What happens next? I am so fucked up right now. . . I know that I will heal🐾 I've never experienced this pain before. . #shock #denial #lost #sad #grieving #reminiscing #breathing #thinking #surreal #youwerejusthere #bestfriend #puppylove #1 #lifeofcapone #loyal

TODAY.. By far has been hardest day of my entire life. PLEASE send Capone & I your love and prayers as he's made his transition too the next level. My heart is shattered.. 💔 I will not be responding.. 🐾 until I emotionally can. Thank you.. .. REST IN LOVE ~ MY TRUEST LOVE

Sweetest Dreams 💫 . . . . . . @hushtan_mahriah @hushtan_hushgirls Photography: @evoke_weddings Make-up: @hushtan_taelor @taelorfx Brows: @hushtan_jill @revivaloregon Styling: @i_am_rae_chell Airbrush Tan: @hushtan

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