SNAP Yep, I did that. It was bound to happen. Am I surprised. Not even a – dash – Fuck this ignorance and smash negativity in its tracks. Yes, in my home that is a fact. I think probably in Charlie Sheen‘s home too.. As a matter of fact.. WINNER! Just felt the need to do that.. (Mental reminder to myself ← I have been ↓overloaded↓ for sometime. I have asked for help. Sweetly, screamingly. I have said (((ALOUD))) if something does not give.. My heart will make its rift. I’m not a kid. I’m a grown ass woman. I have done ALL I could. Taking from myself and Masterminds books. Look Not trying to be hurtful. Cruel intentions are not what I’m about. But, I’m bleeding daily and I have to help myself. I can not continue to do for you and you and you and you and you. Physically and mentally I am bruised. ALL shades in every crevice. Written ALL over my face. My body rigid at the thought of a fake embrace. I’m dealing with real shit. Real life. Court case after court case. Yes, it’s taken a toll. I see the broken blood vessels that line the eyes on my face. My smile gone long ago.. To the world I look like an abandoned glass house. No-one home. Telephone talker I AM not. I live in ((stereo)) downloading, updating, UP↑grading daily. Please, don’t be mad or sad.. Because You and I are on different levels. This feeling is sublime.. Intoxicating.. Magnificent. INCREDIBLE. Purely magical. To know the truth and accept the truth will surely set you free.. Well, I can only speak for me. See you on the winning side. Ta’ Ta’ for now! see ya.. I can’t wait! Ciao.. Bella.. (just always wanted to say that) ALL my love to “U”. Do it! Do it! You can.. Just walk through. Ahhhhhh…. See I told you! But, better yet. You allowed me to show.. you.. “U” (niverse).
It’s difficult staying positive. Most difficult thing I ever did. My heart is bruised once again.Trusting in others, looking outside myself for a friend. Helpful nudge.. Bitter sweet fudge. Life continues on. I frown at the future. Prolonged pain. For living a life in vain. Eternal pain.. I try to understand.. With every fiber in my being. A no win situation. A battle field of wounded souls. Stolen hearts. From broken promises. Liars, thieves. Each stealing energy from me. I need a gateway. Escape rout. Other than myself… Making the best of this..mind fuck of a bucket list.. nightmare, ongoing hell road. Uphill, tumbling down.. land on a cloud.. Slide down a rainbow.. I WILL NOT HARBOR UNHEALTHY THOUGHTS go away.. bad angel.. Energy level low. Not a standstill. Stay ready to go.